Metallica must kick ass at Super Bowl 50

By Steve Newton

Okay, by now we should all be over the disappointment (yeah, right) of the Seahawks handing the Super Bowl over to the “Boston” Patriots at the last minute and proving once and for all that Nirvana is not in the same league as Aerosmith.

Now it’s time to ponder which musical act would be best suited to perform at half time during next year’s roundup of amazing TV commercials that you can’t see if you’re in Canada.

I’ve got nothing against Katy Perry—whose wild ride aboard that weird golden lion in that wacky outfit was something I’d never seen before—but I don’t think I’m alone in thinkin’ that bubblegum pop might not be the only soundtrack to consider for a gig supporting the most violent sport next to hockey.

How about something with a tad more aggression to it? A little more bite? An extra boost of “Beast Mode”, if you will.

How about some HEAVY FREAKIN’ METAL!!!

Next year’s Super Bowl takes place near San Francisco, so what better band to bring the noize than local Bay Area earbusters Metallica? They create the type of raunchy racket that’s perfectly suited to the sight of a player getting cruelly clotheslined or fiendishly face-masked. Metallica songs like “Battery”, “Seek and Destroy”, “Blitzkreig”, and “Broken, Beat and Scarred” lend themselves perfectly to the brutal gridiron vibe.

As does “Harvester of Sorrow”, in Pete Carroll’s case.

Here’s four more reasons why Metallica should play Super Bowl 50:

I saw them at the Pacific Coliseum back in 1989 and they KICKED ASS!

I saw them at the Coliseum again in ’92 and they KICKED ASS then too!

I saw them at Thunderbird Stadium in 1994 and, different venue, same ASS-KICKING!

I saw them at Rogers Arena three years ago and, believe it or not, they were still KICKING ASS like never before!

Football and kicking ass go hand in hand, and so does the Super Bowl and Metallica.

LET’S DO THIS THING!

P.S. If the NFL doesn’t abolish its current pay-to-play policy—where artists compensate the league in return for the immense exposure of appearing at the Super Bowl—the deal’s off. I’m sure I speak for Metallica’s management when I proclaim that the band ain’t payin’ fer shit!