Hearing Dan Baird sing “Van Halen wailin’ on a stereo eight-track” brings back ancient memories

By Steve Newton

Back in the late ’70s/early ’80s I spent way too much time working at a Canada Packers food-processing plant near Chilliwack called York Farms. It was not a great job–unless frantically stacking heavy boxes of juice on wooden pallets for eight hours is your idea of a good time. It was a rather hellish place to be–I saw one poor sap get crippled by machinery–but I didn’t mind the job so much because the place was full of interesting, albeit mostly dispirited small-town characters.

One such fellow whose name has long since vanished had a habit of bringing his crappy portable eight-track player to work. I mean the sound emanating from this bargain-basement contraption was tinny as f***, but he played it painfully loud on the loading dock during lunch breaks, and his entire music collection seemed to consist of the recently released Van Halen II.

Now, I’ve got nothing against that album–in fact I think “D.O.A” is the best VH tune of all time, just edging out “Panama” for the top spot–but the hazy image of this dude cramming a sandwich in his mouth with one hand while obliviously cranking up “Somebody Get Me a Doctor” to an earsplitting level with the other has stuck with me ever since. It was like a Spinal Tap moment, and the words “Van Halen” and “eight-track” now hold a special significance for me.

That’s why I love listening to the Georgia Satellites’ self-titled debut album of 1986. Most folks might only remember that disc for its catchy hit single “Keep Your Hands to Yourself”, but there are a number of killer songs on that LP, including the barnstorming “Red Light”. The fourth line of the first verse–which is the same as the fourth verse–takes me back to those strange days on the York Farms loading dock.

Well my baby called me up said I done made her mad
She’s takin’ me off for everything that I had
Run into town but now she comes back
Got Van Halen wailin’ on a stereo eight-track
‘Watch out baby’, that’s what I said
‘There’s a red light, road block, bridge out ahead’

Of course, only “Red Light” singer Dan Baird, and/or cowriter Neill Bogan, know exactly which Van Halen tape is being referred to in the song. But considering when the Georgia Satellites album was released, most likely it was a David Lee Roth one.

I’m gonna go with Van Halen II, which I eventually scored my own eight-track copy of somewhere along the way. Now all I need is access to the worst-sounding portable eight-track player ever manufactured, and I’ll really be able to reminisce.

To hear the full audio of my 1987 and 1988 interviews with Georgia Satellites guitarist Rick Richards–and my 1995 interview with Alex Van Halen as well–subscribe to my Patreon page, where you can also eavesdrop on over 400 of my uncut, one-on-one conversations with the legends of rock.