Hollywood wins the War for the Planet of the Apes
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JULY 12, 2017 By Steve Newton I’ve harboured a peculiar fondness for the Planet of the Apes movies ever since I saw the 1968 original at […]
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Category Archives: scary movies
It Comes at Night oozes paranoia and dread
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JUNE 7, 2017 By Steve Newton First you had the awesome Get Out blowing scary-movie fans away with its shockingly sly take on racism in America. […]
The Belko Experiment fails, though not for lack of dying
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MAY 12, 2017 By Steve Newton The Belko Experiment looks great on paper if you’re a devotee of scary movies. It’s directed by Aussie Greg McLean, who blew […]
The Void has tons of gore and not much more
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, APRIL 5, 2017 By Steve Newton The Void is like a cosmic cross between the original Hellraiser, John Carpenter’s The Thing, some freaky Lovecraft shit, and that skinless-human […]
Nude Polish mermaids get what they deserve with The Lure
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MARCH 15, 2017 By Steve Newton The last horror-musical I remember seeing was 2008’s Repo! The Genetic Opera, in which director Darren Lynn Bousman of Saw […]
Get Out sets the bar shockingly high for 21st century horror
By Steve Newton If you only see one horror movie this year, let it be Get Out. And if you only see one movie of any kind this year, same […]
The Girl With All the Gifts takes a tender turn with zombies
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, FEB. 22, 2017 By Steve Newton If you’re not a fan of flesh-eater flicks by now, you surely won’t be after seeing The Girl With All […]
Rings makes hairball-horror history
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, FEB. 3, 2017 By Steve Newton Rings is the first horror flick I’ve seen since Cheeto Mussolini and his treacherous gang of fear-mongering scuzzballs got access […]
Ear of Newt’s top 5 horror flicks of 2016 (and five more that sucked the biggie)
By Steve Newton Here’s five horror flicks I really enjoyed in 2016: Don’t Breathe “Alvarez–who also cowrote the script–guides the ensuing mayhem with a sure hand, ratcheting up the suspense and […]
Shut In delivers one big twist and a storm of horror clichés
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, NOV. 11, 2016 By Steve Newton Naomi Watts has won some and lost some as far as her lead roles in horror flicks go. She hit […]
Blair Witch goes all-in on freakiness, not so much on scares
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, SEPT. 17, 2016 By Steve Newton The Blair Witch Project was a huge sleeper hit when it came out in 1999. Made on the cheap, it […]
Don’t Breathe delivers endless thrills and chills
By Steve Newton ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, AUGUST 28, 2016 By Steve Newton Director Fede Alvarez blasted onto the scary-movie scene in 2013 with his twisted Evil Dead remake. It was […]
Lights Out ain’t The Babadook, people
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JULY 22, 1016 By Steve Newton Lights Out is a new horror flick about a murderous ghoul that you can only see–and get terrorized by–when the […]
The Purge: Election Year strikes the franchise out
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JULY 1, 2016 By Steve Newton Sorry James DeMonaco, writer-director of the Purge movies: that’s three strikes now. You’re out! In 2013 DeMonaco kickstarted the franchise–based […]
The Shallows is harrowing and ridiculous, just like Jaws
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JUNE 23, 2016 By Steve Newton As a horror director, Jaume Collet-Serra has had his ups and downs. He impressed with his feverishly twisted 2005 debut […]
The Neon Demon takes an arty puke on the fashion industry
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JUNE 22, 2016 By Steve Newton L.A.’s high-fashion industry gets eaten alive and puked back up in Danish provocateur Nicolas Winding Refn’s depraved and baffling The Neon […]
The Conjuring 2 is so long it hurts
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JUNE 10, 2016 By Steve Newton My biggest beef with The Conjuring 2 isn’t that it’s an overbaked and predictable possessed-kid-in-a-haunted-house flick. Or that it’s one […]
Green Room takes skinhead horror to grisly new heights
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, APRIL 25, 2016 By Steve Newton I love Green Room‘s plot about a destitute punk band trapped in a grungy backwoods bar by murderous neo-Nazi skinheads as […]
10 Cloverfield Lane is the best scary movie of 2016 (so far)
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MARCH 10, 2016 By Steve Newton I’ve reviewed five horror flicks this year, and not one of them–including the much ballyhooed The Witch–has blown me away. So […]
The Witch has a goat and a lot of yak
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, FEB. 17, 2016 By Steve Newton The Witch is a smartly shot, well-acted, atmospheric fright flick that aims to shed light on humanity’s dark history of […]
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies equals yuck
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, FEB. 3, 2016 By Steve Newton The only thing worse than a novel combining Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice with zombie fiction, apparently, is a film version […]
The Boy isn’t the worst creepy-doll flick ever made
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 22, 2016 By Steve Newton In the realm of creepy-doll flicks, nothing tops Magic, director Richard Attenborough’s riveting 1978 adaptation of William Goldman’s novel about a […]
The 5th Wave takes alien-attack flicks to a new low
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 21, 2016 By Steve Newton Sci-fi action flicks about alien invasions are pretty hit-and-miss. For every kickass Edge of Tomorrow you’ll find a crappy Independence Day. And then there’s The 5th […]
The Forest is long on jump scares, short on suspense
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 7, 2016 By Steve Newton The first scary movie out of the gate last year was the Jennifer Lopez thriller The Boy Next Door, which didn’t […]
Krampus makes the most of demonic gingerbread men
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, DEC. 4, 2015 By Steve Newton Anyone who enjoyed mid-‘80s horror-comedies that relied on animatronic puppets for their chills and chuckles—movies like Gremlins and the lower-rent Ghoulies—may get a […]
Victor Frankenstein breathes new life into Mary Shelley’s classic monster tale
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, NOV. 25, 2015 By Steve Newton Horror fans who suffered through last year’s abysmal I, Frankenstein—not to mention Dracula Untold, Godzilla, and WolfCop—could be forgiven for giving up on […]
Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse earns a single merit badge for gore
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, OCT. 30, 2015 By Steve Newton These days you can barely swing a chainsaw without hitting a zombie-based movie or TV show, but Scouts Guide to the […]
The Ghost Dimension ends the once-great Paranormal Activity franchise on a bogus note
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, OCTOBER 23, 2015 By Steve Newton The makers of the latest (and allegedly last) Paranormal Activity film just don’t get it. The secret to the found-footage series’ success […]
Crimson Peak may be the most ravishing horror movie ever made
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, OCT. 16, 2015 By Steve Newton “Ghosts are real,” proclaims Edith (Mia Wasikowska) at the start of Crimson Peak, and for the next two hours Guillermo Del […]
Goodnight Mommy’s quiet horror screams dread
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, OCT. 9, 2015 By Steve Newton Goodnight Mommy opens with a gentle lullaby–Brahms’ “Cradle Song”, to be exact–but that’s it for sweetness and light in this unnerving […]
The Green Inferno is a weak homage to cannibal horror
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, SEPT. 25, 2015 By Steve Newton If you were a horror fan in the eighties you were no doubt aware of the cannibal exploitation genre, which […]
The Visit drives a nail in the coffin of the found-footage format–with a twist!
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, SEPT. 11, 2015 By Steve Newton Will M. Night Shyamalan ever clue in? Just because there’s a twist in a movie doesn’t mean the movie’s any […]
Backcountry will scare you out of the woods
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, AUG. 24, 2015 By Steve Newton If you’re thinking about going camping anywhere bears might be, Backcountry is definitely not for you. It’s Stephen Colbert’s worst nightmare come […]
Sinister 2 is a groan-inducing cash grab
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, AUG. 19, 2015 By Steve Newton Blumhouse Productions’ 2012 sleeper Sinister was an impressively creepy fright flick that drew much of its strength from Ethan Hawke’s convincing portrayal […]
Came across a real Creep on Netflix last night
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, AUG. 9, 2015 By Steve Newton I had a hankering for a scary movie late last night so took a look at the Horror Movies section […]
Jason Bateman discovers his dark side in The Gift
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT. COM, AUG. 5, 2015 By Steve Newton If you thought Jason Bateman could only play affable sad-sacks, prepare for a nice surprise with The Gift. The actor […]
The Gallows’ horror hangs on tired found-footage clichés
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JULY 10, 2015 By Steve Newton I wonder how much longer teenaged moviegoers’ patience with low-budget “found footage” horror can last? Kids must be getting sick […]
Insidious: Chapter 3 gets the horror franchise back on track
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JUNE 5, 2015 By Steve Newton The first Insidious movie was quite impressive, boasting plenty of genuinely creepy scares before slipping into silliness in its final act. […]
Poltergeist is scary loud, not scary good
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MAY 22, 2015 By Steve Newton The first clue that Poltergeist might suck is the toothy skull presented at the start to signify that it’s from Ghost House […]
Unfriended leaves viewers in pixelated purgatory
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, APRIL 18, 2015 By Steve Newton You’ve gotta give Blumhouse Productions credit: they sure know how to make big bucks off cheaply made horror flicks. The […]
It Follows is the finest horror flick in years
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MARCH 25, 2015 By Steve Newton Every once in a while a low-budget indie fright flick comes along that makes everything on the major studios’ horror […]
The Intruders is about as scary as iCarly
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MARCH 18, 2015 By Steve Newton Horror movies featuring actors who are also pop stars are often nothing to scream about. J.Lo in Anaconda and the mostly naked […]
The Lazarus Effect is a Flatliners ripoff unworthy of resuscitation
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, FEB. 25, 2015 By Steve Newton The Lazarus Effect reminds me a bit of that made-in-Vancouver horror flick Hideaway, in which characters that are brought back to life […]
Stephen King’s Pet Sematary recalled by “dead” cat’s return from the grave
sadly, this is not the work of Tom Savini By Steve Newton The film version of Stephen King’s terrifying 1983 novel, Pet Sematary, sucked the biggie. I reviewed it way back in the spring […]
Will Blackburn continue the upward swing of Vancouver-shot horror?
By Steve Newton I’ve long complained about the lack of decent horror flicks being made in and around Vancouver, but in recent years Hollywood has upped its game considerably as […]
The Boy Next Door is no Boys Next Door
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 24, 2015 By Steve Newton The Boys Next Door is an awesome movie. Maxwell Caulfield and Charlie Sheen were perfect as angst-ridden teens on a murderous rampage […]
F**k the Oscars, here’s the Fangoria Chainsaw Awards nominees
The 2015 Academy Award nominations were announced today and, as expected, the horror genre got left out in the winter cold to die a slow, painful death. When was the last time […]
Don’t mess with Ripley when she’s got the Alien flamethrower in the backyard
go ahead, click on the flame. You’ll singe your eyebrows Somebody posted this photo on Reddit of Sigourney Weaver trying out the flamethrower from Alien on the backlot lawn of Shepperton Studios in 1978. […]
The Year in Fear: 21 horror-flick rankings with zero pandering
Just because the last horror movie I saw (The Babadook, above) was 2014’s best doesn’t mean it was a great year for horror. All told, I reviewed 21 fright flicks this […]
The Babadook is the most moving and memorable fright flick of the year
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, DEC. 3, 2014 By Steve Newton Is The Babadook a slow-burning, Repulsion-style psychodrama depicting a lonely woman’s paranoid descent into madness? Or is it more of a flat-out horror […]
