ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, APRIL 9, 2008 The Ruins is a horror flick about deadly, creeping vines that attack tourists at a Mayan temple in Mexico. It is based on a novel by Scott B. Smith, who also wrote the screenplay and who previously garnered an Oscar nomination for adapting his first novel, A Simple … Continue reading Horror review: The Ruins
Horror review: Shutter
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, MARCH 26, 2008 Hollywood’s habit of churning out crappy remakes of Asian horror flicks continues unabated with Shutter, which attempts to do for cameras what The Ring did for videocassettes, what Pulse did for computers, and what The Grudge did for grudges. Nicole Kidman knockoff Rachael Taylor and Dawson's Creek’s bland … Continue reading Horror review: Shutter
Horror review: The Eye
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, FEB. 6, 2008 Discerning horror fans may have thought that the Americanization of Asian fright flicks hit rock bottom with last month’s One Missed Call. Things haven’t improved with The Eye, a remake of a Hong Kong shocker about a young woman who undergoes a double corneal transplant and then suffers … Continue reading Horror review: The Eye
Horror review: Untraceable
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 30, 2008 It was only a matter of time before the lamentable movie subgenre known as torture-porn stopped being the sole property of the horror scene and grew into a marketable angle for the mainstream thriller. Untraceable boasts a respected director (Gregory Hoblit of Fracture and Primal Fear), and a … Continue reading Horror review: Untraceable
Horror review: Cloverfield
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 23, 2008 Imagine if somebody came up to you, grabbed your head, and jiggled it around for 80 minutes. Now imagine they did that while you were trying to watch a movie about a monster attacking New York City. Pretty irritating, eh? Cloverfield’s herky-jerky camerawork isn’t the only thing preventing … Continue reading Horror review: Cloverfield
Horror review: One Missed Call
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, JAN. 9, 2008 While exiting the theatre after a screening of One Missed Call, I overheard a barrage of extremely negative viewer comments. The derisive chatter was enough to renew my faith in today’s mainstream horror crowd. The latest Americanization of a Japanese fright flick (renegade director Takashi Miike’s Chakushin ari), … Continue reading Horror review: One Missed Call
Horror review: The Orphanage
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, DEC. 20, 2007 Somebody ought to kidnap the directors of the Saw and Hostel films, strap them into those torture chairs they're so fond of, attach some eyelid clamps from A Clockwork Orange, and make them watch The Orphanage for a week straight. Maybe then they'd understand that unrelenting sadism and … Continue reading Horror review: The Orphanage
The Orphanage’s Juan Antonio Bayona drawn to the dark side
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, DEC. 20, 2007 By Steve Newton Most people have a keen recollection of the first film that scared the crap out of them. For Spanish director Juan Antonio Bayona, it wasn't anything as fright-worthy as The Exorcist; he got creeped out by seeing Frank Langella go batty in a justifiably overlooked … Continue reading The Orphanage’s Juan Antonio Bayona drawn to the dark side
Horror review: Awake
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, DEC. 5, 2007In Awake, Vancouver-born Hayden Christensen (Anakin Skywalker in the most recent Star Wars flicks) plays the incredibly wealthy–and terribly ill–Wall Street tycoon Clay Beresford. He inherited a multimillion-dollar company from his father, but he desperately needs a heart transplant if he's going to see 30. Luckily for him, one … Continue reading Horror review: Awake
Horror review: The Mist
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, NOV. 21, 2007 Writer-director Frank Darabont had skillfully translated the human drama of Stephen King's work in The Green Mile and The Shawshank Redemption, but he seems hopelessly lost in The Mist , his adaptation of the horror master's 1980 novella. Its first half-hour echoes the severe lousiness of Maximum Overdrive, King's first and last director's job, … Continue reading Horror review: The Mist
Wildly entertaining P2 is an old-school nail-biter
ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED ON NOV. 7, 2007 By Steve Newton As if underground parking wasn't scary enough already. Ever try finding an empty spot in the Metrotown parkade on the weekend? The stress involved with that alone can kill ya. I just say, 'Screw it,' park out on the street somewhere, and deal with the pouring rain. … Continue reading Wildly entertaining P2 is an old-school nail-biter
Horror review: Saw IV
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, OCT. 31, 2007In Saw III, the murdering genius known as Jigsaw finally got his comeuppance. He was a dead human, with no possibility of a Michael Myers- or Jason Voorhees-style resurrection. But since when has a little thing like death stopped a horror franchise from cashing in?Jigsaw is back–or at least his … Continue reading Horror review: Saw IV
Horror review: 30 Days of Night
ORIGINALLY POSTED ON STRAIGHT.COM, OCT. 24, 2007 As 30 Days of Night unfolds, hunky sheriff Eben Oleson (Josh Hartnett) and his pretty wife, Stella (Melissa George), are on the outs. They're living in Barrow, the northernmost town in Alaska, and it's the day before the sun sets and doesn't reappear for a month. She's trying … Continue reading Horror review: 30 Days of Night